DECADE

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Sometimes as parents, wives and husbands we feel like we are drowning, drowning in responsibility. Working to make ends meet so much, that we lose ourselves. We lose who we are as husband and wife. That connection and spark you had when you first started dating disappears and replaces itself with nagging, frustration and your ability to hold niceties has vanished.

 

I am learning, That this is OK.

 

This month we (my husband and I) celebrate ten years being together………..Ten years nothing to bat an eyelid at! Where has that time gone.

This hasn’t come without its hard times. This is real. This is life together. This is what I have come to believe is the norm of not just marriage (as you might not be married but finding the same bumps in the road) but together as a co-habitat of life. There are days, weeks and months that are hard. It’s not like you are fighting all the time, you are just there, you are present, but you are constantly thinking of what needs to be done next, what part of the daily routine is next, you don’t mean to. It just happens. You mentally have checked out without realising and are cruising on auto pilot and going through the motions of the day.

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Its ok to feel like we are doing more then we believe we are capable of, being stretched to the limit, as a parent and neglecting that promise we made as husband and wife.

I have come to value the times that are a bit harder as it makes me really appreciate the times where everything falls into place and seem that bit easier.

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Just recently we have had a bit of a social buzz taking us physically away from our roles as parents. I didn’t realise how badly we needed it. Life has been a huge juggling act this past year with hubby working away. Parenting on my own, taking on the responsibilities for work, house life, mum and parenting as well as working from home. 12 months of this, 12 months of being a solo parent 5 and ½ days a week. – I tell you – parents who do this 7 days/week, 52 weeks/year my hat is firmly off to you! What an adjustment!!! Without even realising I would make tiny changes in routine and not communicate these and expect him to know what they are. Then get cranky when he wouldn’t do it (such a bitch I know). Then adjusting to him being home, don’t get me wrong. I was so grateful he was home but I hadn’t realised how much we had changed in 12 months to not really living together to all of a sudden back to life together. I was so excited but naive to think that we were the same people (I hadn’t realised how strong emotionally I had become without him around) and it would be as though nothing had changed. Being contracted back down home meant readjusting to sharing the parenting role, readjusting to sharing the work load again and readjusting to our lives together as a family 7 days a week. This came with its challenges and hurdles but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I love that he is home every day and the kids get to actually see him for more then 36 hrs a week.

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Not realising until these last 4 weeks how much we needed it to be just us. To reconnect for that strong parent alliance again. At the beginning, I felt horrible leaving the kids, I don’t normally but with everything that has been going on I was emotional, then I realised how much I had missed this man. How much I have craved time with him. Adoring the moments with him and him alone. No one tugging at my clothes to get me to get their drink, or that they wanted a hug or they can’t open the toilet door.

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I won’t feel guilty for it. Yes, I missed them. But I know to have a healthy relationship and demonstrate how a marriage should work I need to reconnect with him. With the man who has given me my dreams and more. Grateful that he chose me to be the mother of his children. That he trusts me enough to raise them with him. Know that I will hold my head oh so high with the 4 children I have been blessed with in my life. What greater gift than your partner believing you can be the best asset to their child.

I appreciate everything he does, I always have.

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So, take those moments.

Take the dinners, the movies, the day dates.

Reconnect.

Be together.

 

 

Tip Top Changes

 

Our life since having kids has seen such huge changes, the biggest of which would have to be eating habits.

Our days would consist of getting out of bed, going straight to work with no breakfast, then eating the bare minimum during the day, and home to a healthy-ish meal (although not portioned at all).

 

 

I knew this needed to change in order for us to set an example of how to look after yourself properly, and to move your body regularly. It’s important for our kids to see their parents practise what they preach. This has been made so much easier with TipTop The One Mixed Grains providing the perfect start to the day with simple but nutritious toast (It’s even better when it’s a weekend and we can take it slow and let the kids pop their own slices in the toaster, choose toppings and learn good breakfast habits). Knowing that Olivia has a healthy lunch box (without the disagreements and arguments that she “doesn’t like that bread”) is a daily relief. It’s the simple things that we appreciate these days! And the big bonus – no little un-eaten surprises in her lunch box from a half-eaten sandwiches that have too many “bits in it”.

 

 

 

It’s a WIN WIN for this mum!
Recipe Lunch box favourite: Ribbon Sandwich (photos below) – peanut butter
– banana
or
– ham and cheese

 

Sleep tips and tricks!

 

How much pressure we and so much of society put on us as parents is ridiculous! 9 times out of 10 one of the main questions asked is “Are they sleeping through?” Are you kidding me!!! How about a more common question like “how are we all adjusting”??

Although we were very lucky with our babies and their sleeping habits I have found having the same routine since birth has helped our children. By routine, I mean pattern, the same order we do everything for bed.
 
Firstly, our bedtime routine.

  • Its the usual dinner starts at 5.30 and carries on until about 6.15 then there is half an hour of play time in the bath and at 6.45 its Milk and a biscuit for the big kids. Story time and then off to bed by 7/7.15. Although in saying that yes I am one of those parents who let their children have a bottle in their bed (my children my choice, I am aware of what this can do to their teeth) to go off to sleep. We do although have a self settle approach from day dot which has worked a treat!

 

Secondly, when I go to bed, I pop them on the toilet (those who are toilet trained) and then change nappies for those who aren’t, I believe that if they have a dry nappy during the night they are less likely to wake earlier with a full nappy. Trust me, my children’s kidneys work an absolute treat, we should have purchased shares in nappies!!!!!

 

Thirdly I have never tried to keep a quiet house. I believe they sleep better when there is noise around and I guess seeing as I am a light sleeper I was hoping by encouraging noises it might make them deeper sleepers……. ridiculous I know but I can dream!

 

Fashion Week Review

So last week I took a selfish week…..

I took 3 days where I organised all the children to be elsewhere and was lucky enough to follow a passion which I love, but have been very intimidated by, FASHION.

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It was my very first year of attending and I felt very blessed to have the opportunity to see quite a few showcases at MBFWA. I’ll let you in on a little secret, Fashion and I have been fighting for a while now…..come to think of it close to 5 years.

 

5 years of being in awe of styles and clothing that I cannot wear. Cannot wear out of feeling uncomfortable, feeling judged, feeling like mutton dressed as lamb…is that the saying?? Haha. Where has this even come from?? A mix of having 3 children and hitting 30, feeling like I am stuck in a fashion warp of the unknown, knowing I cannot pull of certain styles and trends any more. I love looking at styles in awe and admiration, I love the street trends and appreciate everyone’s unique style and sense of fashion.

 

So let’s go back to the reason I am writing this blog, haha not because of my reclaimed love of fashion, but for the appreciation of Mercedes Benz Fashion Week Australia. Where the young and fresh to the established and iconic designers have the ability to display their new collections and set the benchmark high on some exquisite pieces.

 

I have added the links in here to which you can see my fav shows as let’s face it, I am not a photographer and every time I tried to get a good pic I was too excited, so let’s not bring down the quality of the threads by my poor photographic ability and hand that over to the experts!!!!

First day (which is technically already day 3) I attended Next Gen, showcasing some beautiful pieces from Stanzee – who were the first opening resort inspiration of the dark to light and the sheer to bold. This would have to have been my highlight of the show, their collection was ridiculously relatable and some absolutely stunning pieces that I wish I could run out and grab off the models as they walked past.

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-project-nextgen-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Following show we attended was Pagaent – a wonderful artistry and creative flowing street where style with again some beautiful mesh detailing pieces which were jaw dropping.

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-pageant-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Capping the night off with Zambesi….  snagging front row with the bestie and looking at some beautifully designed styles. I loved this show, as well as the music themed with it. Zambesi was the perfect collection to finish my first day on.

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-zambesi-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Day two, back to the beauty of carriage works for The Swim show case……WOW! This is a showcase that I loved EVERY single designer in it. All the pieces of swim where stunning, you think you had seen it all but the beautifully designed one pieces (which are my current fav to be running after the kidlets in) and the fabrics and colours……. Did I mention I LOVED this show??? In awe of every singles design collection that walked down. I felt like a kid in a candy store!!!!!

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-swim-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Innovators saw the end of day two for me and I love seeing how talented these people are, it just blows my mind the capability of designing such beautiful clothes. The colours and sheers are gorgeous but my fav would have to be Richard Giang with the black numbers…….. cannot go wrong with black J

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-the-innovators-fashion-design-studio-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Raffles kicked off day three, which in turn is day 5 for MBFWA and the concluding day of fashion week. A wonderful showcase of up and coming designers with some pieces beyond their years in the industry, showing wonderful potential for what is to come to the fashion world and hopefully we will be wearing in the not too near future.

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-raffles-international-showcase-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Finishing the last day of fashion week with VMajor. Haven’t heard of them?? Do yourself a favour and check out their threads, what a fresh approach to street and resort wear looking oh so comfortable as they walked down the catwalk!

http://mbfashionweek.com/gallery/aus-vmajor-runway-mercedes-benz-fashion-week-australia-2017

Hope your cuppa is still warm and you have enjoyed flicking through my journey for fashion week. What a wonderful experience and this makes me so excited for the future of the fashion world and watching these designers bloom and these beautiful pieces out and about. The week wouldn’t have been made anywhere near perfect without the bestie by my side and fashion squad on point.

 

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13 Reasons why I am questioning what the future will be like for my Kids.

There has been a lot of buzz around the TV show “13 reasons why” showing on Netflix, I had first heard about it while doing a wedding make up for a family of all girls, saying how every parent should watch it. I thought it couldn’t hurt to sit down and watch…little did I know how deeply this would impact me and make me question the future for my kids…… exactly what it was supposed to do.

 

I fear for my children growing up (I know, how horrid does this make me sound). When it gets to the point and they can’t talk to us anymore, about anything. That time will come and as I sit here and think about it, I fill with dread, I fill with fear of the unknown of what may come in to in the teenage years and beyond for my children. I pray that I do all the things I know how to do, to talk about what makes a good person, to talk about how saying something may seem like a good idea but you can never take it back, once it’s said it’s not forgotten. As a parent this is a huge fear of mine, it makes me so so sad to think one day any of my children could go through this feeling that they are all alone and there is nobody there to help them. That there is nobody who cares enough for them?? …….. HOW??

 

 

There has to be something we can do?? Something MORE we can do??

Isn’t there??

  • Talk more to them about how to deal with emotions that make them feel like its too much and the world is swallowing them whole??
  • Talk more to them about bullying??
  • Talk more to them that some days will feel like the world is against you and you have no other option??
  • Talk to them about being treated the way you would want to be treated, the way you would want someone to treat your sister, your brother??

 

How can we make this a better world for them??

 

To those parents who have lost children to depression, bullying and suicide, my heart breaks for you. A thousand times over, it breaks.

How did we create a world where this is even an option?? How did bullying get to a level so intense they can’t even escape it at home? How do we create children to think they are better than everyone else and think its ok to make one and another feel like a failure at life and have a certain social power over others???

 

I say we…… WE are all responsible.

We path the way for our children….. to a degree, we as society have to take a look at ourselves and say what kind of role models are we portraying to the future?? We need to be accountable for our actions, accountable for our choices. To show to our children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews that how you treat people have consequences, it starts  by leading by example.

 

Tell me I’m not the only one who has these fears for their children?? And it’s not just for my daughters either. I fear for all my kids. This will be taking responsibility to a whole new level. Being responsible for someone who thinks they are responsible and grown up enough to make their own decisions??

 

How can we make this easier?? How can we help them without covering them in bubble wrap and allowing them to grow up on their own without being a helicopter parent? Are there things in place at school that are taken seriously like a math test?? An algorithm isn’t going to save your life, will talking about morals and ethics?? Why isn’t life in there as a subject we can help teach and guide them?? Documentaries of families and friends who are affected by bullying, who are affected by depression who are affected by suicide??

 

WHAT CAN WE DO??  Tell me I am not the only one who feels this lost and it hasn’t even begun!

La la la Lipstick ♥️

Why I love the Antipodes lipstick?? 

  • Not only am I crushing on their beautiful colours! I am head over heals with what products they actually are made from, such as avacado, bees wax and nutrient rich pure plant oils. 
  • These literally are good enough to eat as well as nourishing, conditioning and moisturising on the lips these colour combos for Autum are beautiful. I cannot wait to see how winter and spring come along!!! Soooo exciting!
  • I love that antipodes originate from New Zealand and are all naturally inspired (from their bio degradable packaging to their sceanery based names of the colours). 


I have work these colours a couple of times to work now and am getting so many lovely compliments about the shades and how lovely they are. From someone who wears quite a bit of lipstick for work I am really loving how these lipsticks are leaving my lips feeling at the end of the day. They don’t feel dried out or like these @antipodesskincare lipsticks are cracking my lips. So this is a massive bonus!!! 

I just want to add, When we attended the breakfast launch of Antipodes I was in awe of Em from @mypaleskinblog and her courage to put her face out there to be ridiculed and trolled. So here is a quick shout out and hats off to you woman…. travelling around exposingthat first viral video A.M.A.Z.I.N.G

Thank you for a beautiful day ladies 💋

How To…….. Tanning

Tanning has come so far in such a little time, I have pasty white skin so since Completing my beauty therapy training 13 years ago I have always tanned, so these a tips and tricks I have learnt along the way. 9 times out of 10 these days people are fake tanned rather then real. And thats a good thing. Looking after your skin is so very important, you don’t want to bake out in the sun and damage all your skin cells (causing loss of elastin and collagen which is how wrinkles are born) and run the risk of getting Skin cancer. Dramatic I know but you really gotta look after your skin!!!!!!!!


These are some steps I tell my clients about tanning. There is a lot to them but once you practise them trust me your tan will be even and natural for longer.

Weather it be how to prep your skin for a tan (self tan or profession tan) or how to maintain your tan after…these tips are sure to get you the longest possible duration for your colour and iron out any problems with streaking ect.

BEFORE YOUR TAN

  1. Make sure you have any waxing done 2 days before and shaving 1 day prior.
  2. Scrub scrub scrub. Grab an exfoliant and give your body a good shedding (exfoliating is fabulous way of getting rid of all your dead skin cells…….your tan will grab to areas that have dry skin so best to give it a good scrub)
  3. Moisturise. By moisturing (especially after your scrub) you are making sure your skin in nourished with moisture allowing a more even colour and coverage.
  4. Wash your hair! A common mistake is to get your tan done and then the next night you wash your hair ready fro the weekend. The soap in the shampoos will react with your tan so better having your hair freshly washed right before you have your tan OR go to the hair dresser and get them to wash it in the basin!!
  5. Apply tan (or turn up to tan appointment) straight from shower. This means dry your self off with your towel and apply with circular motion> Making sure you have NO moisturiser, NO perfume, NO make up, NO deodorant. If you are going to a tanning appointment make sure you have loose close to change into after and a towel in your car (incase of rain. you don’t want to look like you have chicken pox) 

AFTER YOUR TAN

  1. Depends how long your tan is on for (2-8hrs) make sure you remain cool and don’t do anything that is going to cause you to sweat your tan off. Best to do it when you know the kids have been bathed and excellent excuse to get out of washing up!!! If its in winter opposite, blast the heater as heat activates the colour in Tan.
  2. I generally wash my hands after 20 minutes of tanning. If you have an 8 hour tan on wash them after 4 hours, it just makes it look a little more natural. if its a 2 hour tan, wash them after 45 minutes.
  3. Once time is up have a QUICK 30 second shower and DO NOT USE SOAP!!!! And make sure you moisturise with a light moisturiser not a body butter as this will move any loose tan around too much.  This step is very important. You will more then likely see all your colour go down the drain….this is just the cosmetic bronzer. Do Not Panic! 
  4. The next 24 hours are vital. Make sure your next shower is 12 hrs hours after your initial tan shower. No exercise (Your colour will develop over the next 12-24 hrs so it is important to, not do anything that will cause you to sweat (exercise, team sport, sport, intimate exercise……yes that means no sex). No soap (just in the appropriate areas) No long baths or swimming, this will cause your colour to deteriorate at a fast rate and your tan may only last a couple of days.


 

Over the next 7 days make sure your showers are very short and minimal soap it used. Also if you tan weekly watch the next blog or vlog???? (undecided yet) on how to remove tan quick and easy!!!!!

If you have any queries or questions pop them in the comments below and I can try to help out where possible.

Holiday Life 

6 weeks on holidays pure bliss!!!! 
Sleep ins.
Relaxing.
Long walks and adventures.
Coffee dates.
Wondering the shops.


WRONG!!!!

More like, up between 5 and 7am, in the kitchen until at least 10 with the breakfast prep, cleaning up any of the spills, cleaning the dishes, changing the clothes they insisted on changing into before breakfast and then preceding to spill their entire breakfast on the clean clothes, get changed AGAIN, put dirty clothes in machine ready for first wash of the day.


Ahhhhhhhhhhh and so it begins, holiday life with 3 children under 5! 

I learnt very quickly this week (beginning our third week of holidays away from home) after the hype of Christmas and New Year has died down, Dad has flown back home for work how much the kids and I are customized to our everyday routine and how sitting around swimming and not really doing anything out of the house puts all 4 of us in a really shitty mood.

I had a couple of breakdowns the other day and couldn’t quiet figure out what was going on and then it dawned on me how much of a different pace our holidays are with our every day life and that potentially we need that structure and routine. The girls need their socializing with other kids (preschool and daycare structure), I need that half hour session to work out on my own so I have don’t h ability of being about to approach my motherhood duties with in a rational manner as opposed to the breaking down and losing my shit approach!!!
So to all those wonderful Mumma’s out there enjoying their holidays with their children and their ability to relax…. TELL ME YOUR SECRET!!!!!

 Or is this just the way my family is wired? To live with the pace of structure and routine?! 

All Day is ‘mum’ ‘ma’ ‘muuuuuuuum’ ‘MUMMY’ and drive me bat shit crazy with consistent arguing with each other and constant feeding (honestly all they do is eat, Aldi I need to buy shares or turn my profession into chef??) 

Ironic really how  I thought holiday life would be any different to work life?? 

I have to admit though, now I have realised the glitz and glamour is far less then what I imagined with holidaying solo with kids. I am looking forward to the rest of our time away keeping in mind  some kind of activity routine for the next three weeks… ahhhhhhh #holidaymummode